Boaz goes public with his intentions regarding Ruth. In Ruth 4:10, he says, “Also Ruth the Moabite, the widow of Mahlon, I have bought to be my wife, to perpetuate the name of the dead in his inheritance, that the name of the dead may not be cut off from among his brothers and from the gate of his native place. You are witnesses on this day.” Occasionally, someone says to me, “We live with each other because we really love each other, and we’re married in God’s eyes, so what difference does the piece of paper make.” When I hear that (more often than I’d like), I always remember Glen Campbell’s song, “Gentle on My Mind.” He sings, “And it’s knowing I’m not shackled by forgotten words and bonds and the ink stains that have dried upon some line…” I might argue that those words did their part in adding to the promiscuity and emotional misery of those of us who grew up in the sixties. Boaz tells the elders and all those in the public gathering that “they are witnesses on this day” to the event in which he took Ruth as his wife.
What difference does it make? It makes all the difference! Ogilvie says it best: “My answer is, ‘All the difference.’ It is no accident that some form of public marriage ceremony exists in almost every culture of the world. It is important socially that others know publicly that two people are committing themselves to one another in marriage. But it is also very important for each individual within the partnership. If the love commitment that a man and woman have for each other is not prepared to go public so that everyone knows they are man and wife, then I would question whether it is real love or a real commitment at all. Until it is affirmed in the presence of a witness, either partner has a right to question how deep the other’s love truly is, however passionately it may be expressed.”[1]
Further, as Carson says, “There is a wider aspect to the public nature of marriage. It has deep theological echoes, and it ties public marriage yet more deeply into the great themes of the story of redemption. The whole business of public records, certificates, and genealogies is marginalized and minimized when there is non-marital cohabitation. The marriage certificate, the despised “piece of paper,” may speak to us theologically of the blessing of connectedness, which is underscored by the record of genealogies in the Bible. The curse of sin is that it leads to fragmentation, hostilities, and barriers between people. Salvation gathers people together, connects them to one another, and seeks the goal of a united humanity. To be married is to be tied into a web of publicly attested and recorded loyalties; to cohabit unmarried is to be a blip under the microscope of the observant social scientist.”[2]
[1] Jackman, David, and Lloyd J. Ogilvie. 1991. Judges, Ruth. Vol. 7. The Preacher’s Commentary Series. Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson Inc.
[2] Carson, Stafford. 2004. “Review of Marriage: Sex in the Service of God by Christopher Ash.” Westminster Theological Journal 66, no. 1: 257.