When Paul exhorts children to “obey” their parents, he is simply asserting an inherent obligation. Obedience to parents is not the sole teaching of the scriptures. Every ancient and contemporary civilization commands obedience from children to their parents. It’s part of the natural law of the universe. We need no special revelation for this truth. It’s readily apparent to everyone. But God goes out of his way to instruct us according in both the Old Testament and the New Testament. We see the command to honor your parents in the Ten Commandments themselves and then again in Paul’s writing to the Ephesians.
But the Bible adds a new dimension to children’s relationship with their parents. Both Moses and Paul say we are to “honor” them. The Hebrew word “kabed,” for honor, means to be heavy or weighty. We still use terms like this today. When we talk of people who “carry a lot of weight,” we are talking about those who people listen to and have influence. Weighty people are important people in our lives. In Scripture, there is an antonym to honor, and it is all. It means “to curse.” Literally, it means to “be light or of little weight.” Again, today, we think of people who carry no weight with regard to certain situations. We might even refer to them as “lightweights.”
To honor our mothers is to regard them as highly valued and make them “heavyweights” in our lives. I think it was Smalley & Trent who said, “Some people treat their parents as if they are a layer of dust on a table. Dust weighs almost nothing and can be swept away with a brush of the hand. Dust is a nuisance and an eyesore that clouds any real beauty the table might have.” When we treat our mothers as lightweights, it is not only wrong, but it is also dishonoring to God. God calls us to value them deeply. I don’t think I’ve lived up to that as well as I should have in my younger years, but after becoming a Christian, I took my role as a son more seriously. I’ve lived most of my life away from my parents. For much of that time, I would ignore them. Later, I determined to Honor my mother, so I would write to her at least once a week and try my best to call her on her birthday and Mother’s Day. It wasn’t much, but she often told others how important my letters were to her. Now that my mother has been gone for many years, I think of so many ways I could have honored her. I often wish I had given this command more attention in my life. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother – this is the first commandment with a promise.” Ephesians 6:1-2